Lord English

NOTE: SEIZURE WARNING: Some of the images in this article contain flashing lights and colors that could potentially be harmful. Please proceed with caution. Thank you.

"Mature Content Warning!" ‎This article contains some content involving a mature subject or situation and may not be suitable for younger viewers. If you are 18 years or older or are comfortable with graphic material, you are free to view this page.

Pure Evil
Full Name	Caliborn
Alias	Lord English Angel of Double Death Speaker of the Vast Honk The Mirthful Messiah (with Doc Scratch; possibly) lord muscleguy (by Meenah) lord kingfish (by Meenah) Lil Cal Lord Jack (when possessing B2 Jack Noir) Union Jack (when possessing B2 Jack Noir) Jack English (when possessing B2 Jack Noir)
Origin	Homestuck
Allies	Doc Scratch The Felt The Handmaid (unwillingly) The Condesce Gamzee Makara Kurloz Makara
Powers / Skills	Total control over the Time aspect Unconditional Immortality Invulnerability High strength High speed Mouth beam Nigh-omnipotence Powers of a First Guardian Powers of a Sprite Powers of a Heir of Void Powers of a Bard of Rage Powers of a Prince of Heart (possibly) Cairo Overcoat Golden Cuestaff Chucklevoodoos Possession Omnipresence (thanks to his Time powers) Ability to double-kill Conditional mortality curse Gift of Gab Skeleton Key Badge Poisonous golden tooth (The Homestuck Epilogues)
Goals	Ensure his own existence (succeeded) Double-kill Calliope Destroy everything (both failed)
Moral Event Horizon	Killing his own sister, Calliope. Killing Andrew Hussie and Hussiebot while also harming Ms. Paint. Destroying entire dream bubbles, killing all the ghosts inside.
Kill Count	Countless
Worst Crimes	Attempted omnicide Possession of child pornography (implied) Genocide Mass murder Mass destruction Assault Sororicide
Type of Villain	Cataclysmic Dark Messiah

“	GIRL. YOU THERE. GIRL. GIRL, QUIT ALL THIS SCURRYING AROUND. DO YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN ESCAPE ME BEFORE I ARRIVE? HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO OUTRUN ME WHEN I AM ALREADY HERE?	„
	~ Lord English to the Handmaid.

“	HONK. HONK.	„
	~ Lord English emitting the Vast Honk.

Caliborn is the overarching antagonist of the Homestuck franchise. Formerly just a condescending and immature red-blooded cherub, Caliborn got much worse after getting older and fusing himself with Arquiusprite and half of Gamzee Makara, becoming an all-powerful, time-traveling indestructible demon known as Lord English.

What Makes Him Pure Evil?

Overall

• Although he's an amalgamate of multiple people, he acts as a single being and nothing indicates that he has moral agency issues, especially considering that he has benevolent components too.
  • There are also some strong implications that Caliborn is actually the one in control. If this was the case, then he'd essentially be nothing more than an adult version of the young cherub (which would make him responsible for Caliborn's crimes as well).
• Even if he's a red-blooded cherub (who are malevolent by nature), his actions go too far for his nature to be a justification.
• While there are some implications that he has a child-like mind and that he isn't that smart, that doesn't make him any less of a threat.
• Although he had several comedic moments when he was Caliborn, they were completely subverted when he became Lord English.
  • While some people may found his over-the-top lines as Lord English a somewhat comedic, it doesn't detract him from his villany, since he is still taken dead seriously in-universe. Besides, this behavior just shows how much of a monster he truly is.
• It is heavily implied that he has lewd art of Dirk and his friends (that are represented as teenagers at those drawings).

Homestuck

• It's very likely that, through Lil Cal, he influenced Gamzee into being loyal to Caliborn and possibly contributed to the troll's insanity as well.
• He kills Hussiebot and Andrew Hussie while also hitting a harmless Ms. Paint with his scepter.
• He destroys an entire bubble dream, double-killing all the ghosts inside.
• He massacred most of the Horrorterrors.
• It's heavily implied that he's seeking his "sister" Calliope to permanently kill her.
  • In fact, it's possible that he killed Andrew Hussie because the latter was wearing a troll cosplay very similar to the one Calliope would wear, and so English might have confused Andrew for her.
• When faced by an army of ghosts, he brutally double-kills most of them.
• An alternate version of him possesses B2 Jack Noir through Lil Cal, making him mutilate his own body (such as making him rip his own eyes off to replace them with the puppet's) before causing more destruction.
• Ultimately, English's final goal is to destroy everything (and his destruction is pretty much at a multiversal level since he exists in multiple universes) and he's responsible for almost everything happening in the comic, either directly or indirectly.

The Homestuck Epilogues and Homestuck^2: Beyond Canon

• Regardless of whether The Homestuck Epilogues and Homestuck: Beyond Canon are canon to Homestuck, it's obvious that the latter is canon to the former two since they serve as sequels to it, meaning that Lord English here is responsible for the same crimes he's in canon.
• He impales Juju!Jade, vaporizes Juju!Rose and bites Juju!Dave's head off. The poison in his golden tooth is also what ends up killing Meat!John and Davepetasprite^2 has to sacrifice their own life to throw him into the black hole.
• While he's ultimately killed, it's implied that (alongside Doc Scratch) he became part of Ultimate Dirk (and likely is one of the main reasons of the latter being villainous), making him indirectly responsible for many of the events happening after his own death.

External Links

• Lord English on the Villains Wiki
• Lord English on the MSPA Wiki
• Lord English on the The Ultimate Evil Wiki